Memory
by hitntr01
Summary: Rosalie's thoughts on her past life, two years after she is changed. A short songfic based off of the song Memory from the play 'Cats.'


_**Song: Memory (Please listen to it before reading any further)  
Play: Cats**_

_**Please note: Cats is my favorite play ever! I was watching the movie for the fiftieth time and for some reason I thought of Rosalie immediately when Grizabella sung this song! It's a very sad song, please go listen to it or you may not understand what I'm getting at. The only problem is the song from the movie is the abridged version, I used the full version. Enjoy!**_

_Title: Memories_

_**Memory,  
Turn your face to the moonlight  
Let your memory lead you  
If you find the meaning of what happiness is  
Then a new life will begin…**_

_**Midnight**_

I walked the streets of my old town. I hadn't been here in two years. The odd part was that I looked exactly the same, nothing changed on the outside but for some reason this town changed. Maybe it was just my view on it now. It was midnight now; due to it always being sunny here I had to come at night. I had a destination; I just had to get there.  
_**  
Not a sound from the pavement**_

There was no one out. It was just me and the streetlights. It was unbelievably nice to be the only person around at the moment.  
_**  
Has the moon lost her memory?**_

I was standing under the streetlight that caused me to be who I was now. If I had just kept walking, if I had chosen to go a different route, how different my life could be right now._****_

She is smiling alone  
In the lamplight

I walked away from the spot, moving toward my old house. My parents still lived there. I started to walk through the yard._****_

The withered leaves collect at my feet  
And the wind begins to moan

I peered into the window, no one was awake. Everyone had gone to bed just as I had assumed. I went to the side where my room was. The window was oddly opened. I jumped into it, wanting to see my room one last time._****_

Memory

My family hadn't touched much of it. They must have been extremely grief stricken. My bed, the dresser, and all of my belongings were still here. Two years and nothing changed. There was even a pile of roses that I had collected from the one man I despised. They were all withered away just like my old life. Nothing more than brown stems on my floor while my heart still steamed over with anger._****_

All alone in the moonlight

I sat on my bed feeling the dust poof around me. I saw a picture frame of me and my parents sitting at my nightstand. I picked it up, brushing the dust away. I wish I could cry more than anything._****_

I can smile at the old days  
I was beautiful then

No matter what anyone said, I didn't believe I was beautiful anymore. I was gorgeous back then. My eyes were glistening and my skin wasn't so pale. My parents always told me how beautiful I was and I took that for granted. How I miss those days._****_

I remember the time I knew what happiness was  
Let the memory live again

I laid on my bed a little longer, going under the sheets as if I could sleep there. As if nothing had changed. I wanted more than anything to see my family again and to talk to them. But to talk to them would mean to give myself away, something I could never do. I knew why they left everything the same, deep down, since they never found my body. They were hoping that I would be found. I wish that was true.

I stood up after being in my old room for an hour. I went into my parents' room, peaking in to see both of them sound asleep. "I miss and love you guys." I muttered before going back to my room. I put everything as I found it, taking the picture from my night stand and putting it under my coat. I jumped out of the room to start my lonely journey back to my old life. I walked along as the night wore on. I looked up when a street lamp started to flicker from above me.

_**Every streetlamp  
Seems to beat a fatalistic warning  
Someone mutters  
And the streetlamp gutters  
And soon it will be morning **_

The sun was starting to rise; I could see it coming now. I had to get back before that but for some reason I couldn't find the want to do it. _****_

Burnt out ends of smoky days  
The stale cold smell of morning

People were starting to stir in their beds as I walked along. I was allowing my feet to lead me wherever they wanted to go. I looked up as another street lamp went out.  
_**  
The streetlamp dies, another night is over  
Another day is dawning **_

I knew the sun was rising but found myself at the cemetery. I was looking for something specific.

_**Daylight  
I must wait for the sunrise**_

I put up my hood as the sun started to shine down. I was looking for that one grave that I knew was here. I found it a year ago. _****_

I must think of a new life  
And I mustn't give in

I had a new life now but it was so hard to just get rid of the life I used to have. The life where I could do anything and be anyone. The life I wanted back._****_

When the dawn comes  
Tonight will be a memory too  
And a new day will begin

I stopped at the gravestone I was looking for. My name was engraved with the date I went missing. The words, "Our Families Beautiful Rose" was engraved into it. __

_**Daylight**_

I bent down to it, putting my fingers over the gravestone. I fingered each letter as if I were remaking the sign. I then bent my hand down to pick up a sunflower that was dropped on my grave. It was meant for me. I picked it up as a water droplet fell; as if the flower was crying for me. _****_

See the dew on the sunflower

I sniffed it as a smile graced my lips. _****_

And a rose that is fading  
Roses wither away

I looked up when I heard someone coming in my direction. I was then glad that I did have my hood up as the woman got closer. It was my mother, coming to pay her respects so early in the morning._****_

Like the sunflower  
I yearn to turn my face to the dawn  
I am waiting for the day . . .

"Hello." My mom said.

"Hi." I muttered. I knew she wouldn't recognize my new voice.

"You know Rosalie?" she asked.

"Yeah, you can say that." I muttered, keeping my eyes from her. "And you?"

"I was her mother. Today marks the second year she has been gone. I was hoping we would find her…or at least her body."_****_

Touch me

I wanted to reach out and hold her; tell her that I was right here. Right in front of her. She cried as she put a rose down on the gravestone.

Her tears started to come heavily, "I was just hoping that there could be a chance that our little girl would still be around. Her father is convinced that she is gone. I can't wrap my mind around it."

"I'm sure she is in a better place."

"They all say that."

"It's true. Sometimes there are times where you have to accept that." I stood up, trying my best to keep in what little shade I had as the sun was shining through the trees. "I have to go though. She would want you to move on. Trust me." I said before walking toward the wood line. I felt her eyes peering on me the whole time before I disappeared into the woods._****_

It's so easy to leave me  
All alone with the memory  
Of my days in the sun

I turned around, watching her cry over my gravestone. We were both alone; we were both remembering the good days.

I heard my mom cry out, "Please Rosalie, come around. Show yourself. I miss you and love you."

"I love you too mom." I said turning away from her. I couldn't stay any longer without taking a chance of going back there and telling her who I was. I was so happy to be able to see my mom again. _****_

If you touch me  
You'll understand what happiness is 

I walked back to my new life. I saw Edward and Esme outside talking. They looked up when they saw me coming out of the wood line. I forced a smile at them as I walked past them into the house. I walked up the stairs and into my new room, my new day, my new life.  
_**  
Look  
A new day has begun**_

I took the picture from my coat and placed it on my bed stand. A new day didn't mean I couldn't keep the same memories, it only meant I could gather more. _**  
**_  
_**Fin!**_

_**Please review and let me know what you thought! **_


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